


A Pirate Bedtime Story

by StrawhatsAndDelibirds



Category: One Piece
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-13
Updated: 2016-01-13
Packaged: 2018-05-13 17:50:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5711512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StrawhatsAndDelibirds/pseuds/StrawhatsAndDelibirds
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The middle of the fucking night is always the best time to write. Trust me I'm science.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Pirate Bedtime Story

“What do you think beetles dream about? Do you think it’s fighting? Because I bet it’s fighting.” The obviously exhausted captain mused out loud for everyone in the cabin to hear as he continued to fight against sleep for some reason. There was a collective groan from everyone stuck in there with him as it seemed that there was no signs of stopping, and that they’d be stuck up with him until his stupidity finally tired him out and he fell asleep. It wasn’t even worth the effort to just tell him to go to bed at this point, because it’d just be dismissed with “No wait this is important” and then it’d just be another stupid question that’d lead to an even stupider line of thought.

Looks were silently exchanged with equally agitated and tired looks between the other victims of this tired rambling. No one wanted to deal with this. Everyone was too tired for this nonsense, but someone had to deal with this. It was the only way to make it stop. Zoro couldn’t be the one to step in, because his measures were too extreme. But they were slowly starting to debate on whether to just let him take over and deal with whatever measures a sleep deprived Zoro was willing to take.

Though it seemed as though Luffy had decided for them as to who was going to deal with mess, as he swung his head over his bunk to look down at Sanji, who glared at him. That was not enough to deter the rubber man from continuing on with whatever self-declared important thing that he had to say.

“Hey Sanji! You should make some snacks!” Luffy said, as if it weren’t the middle of the night and everyone wanted to just sleep right now. Except for him for some incredibly stupid reason. Everyone could tell he was tired, so he should just go to bed.

“Luffy it’s the middle of the night. Just go to bed and let us sleep. You can wait until morning, because it’s not that far away now.” He grumbled, rolling over so his back was facing the rubber man who wanted to keep pestering him for food. This didn’t sit well with the captain, who simply flipped over to his other side of the bed so that he was looking at the cook face to face.

“Just one snack, come on Sanji.” Luffy whined, as if that would help his pitiful case. Sanji groaned and rolled onto his back so that he was staring straight up at the bottom of the bunk that his annoying captain was on. Oddly enough, he was feeling a little poetic all of the sudden. It was probably the lack of sleep, but he wasn’t going to fight it.

“The sun’s gone down I know you’ve been fed, the sun’s gone down just go to bed.

Not one more word you will be hit, just go to bed you piece of shit.”

There was a silence, before there was a faint snicker from one of the other bunks. It had better been over the fact that this situation was so stupid and not because his little poem thing he had just said.

“Hey, lemme try.” Usopp interjected, before clearing his throat.

“Our adventuring is done for the day, I’m far too tired now to play.

Stop asking questions and don’t ask why, just go to bed or I will cry.”

Okay, this was a little fun now. It didn’t seem that Luffy agreed. Had he not been being refused snacks, he probably would have found that it was hilarious and encourage it. But right now if the annoyed hums were any indication, he was not happy with this situation. And that just made this all the better.

“Don’t pout and frown, the sun’s already down.

All project are done for now bro, so just go to bed you fucking hoe.”

Franky chimed in before Luffy could protest. Both him and Usopp cheered for him after he joined in. It wasn’t planned, but this was really getting fun.

“It’s getting late I think it’s best, just lay your head down now and rest.

I just can’t stop wondering what went wrong, no you may not have another bed time song.”

Things were starting to pick up now. Brook’s addition was warmly welcomed, as was Franky’s. The point of exhaustion where it just disappeared and you were left dealing with a ton of extra energy was probably upon them, but he had a pretty good feeling that even after they fell asleep, these would still be pure gold. Who knew that they could be such geniuses at this ungodly hour?

By this point, Luffy had already fallen asleep. Sanji knew this because he was snoring in his ear. It was annoying, but now they had moved on for this being just about Luffy. This had evolved into something so much better and it was incredible. Who knew that their captain being a child who refused to go to sleep despite needing it desperately would end up with them bonding over this whole ordeal.

If someone were to tell him a year ago that he’d be part of a pirate crew for one of the most dangerous crews on the sea, and that they’d be spending nights up because their captain wouldn’t stop asking about the thoughts and dreams of beetles, and then end up accidentally turning their attempts to get him to go to bed into the shittiest fucking children’s book, there was no way in hell that he’d believe them. Yet here he was, and he didn’t regret a single moment of this glorious experience.

“Don’t cause a fuss, don’t make a scene, or we’ll just leave you with the marines.

I’ll take you down with so much speed, just go to bed or you will bleed.”

Somehow Zoro’s grumpy addition to this made this infinitely better. Everyone was beyond pleased with him joining in and being the final member in the room to join in on this shitty bedtime story for their shitty captain. The fact that they were not the only ones on this ship didn’t seem to matter anymore, as now they were all there just losing it with how hard they were laughing.

But the laughing came to a stop soon after Usopp abruptly stopped. He was completely wide eyed as if he had thought of something of great importance. All eyes were on him now to see what it was exactly it was that he had to say.

“Oh my god we should write a book.”

* * *

 

Morning had come, and what everyone not part of this adventure had now made their way down to the galley for breakfast, only to be met with a very odd sight. Namely since Sanji who was always so great about being punctual with meals hadn’t seemed to have even started breakfast yet.

Instead he was sitting with Zoro, Brook, and Franky around a mess of papers that had now taken over the entirety of the kitchen table, as Usopp paced behind them. They all seemed to be deep in thought, and possibly only awake because of the coffee in their systems right now. Zoro seemed to only vaguely acknowledge their presence before going back to focusing on whatever it was they were doing.

Fixing their incredibly odd sleep schedules was something that Chopper had given up on a long time ago. Most of them took naps during the day anyways, so it didn’t really matter if it wasn’t eight straight hours that they were getting, so long as they were getting enough. But it wouldn’t stop him from not being happy with this reckless behavior on their part. This was just irresponsible of them. He’d scold them after he figured out what exactly they were working on.

Climbing onto one of the chairs, he leaned over the table to take a look. The girls seemed to be equally interested in this project. It had to be something big for them to all be focusing so hard and for Sanji to be so engrossed in it that he didn’t notice that it was breakfast time and that he hadn’t made anything yet.

It seemed to be a children’s book? That couldn’t have been right. But that was really the only way he could make sense of what he was seeing. But that didn’t seem right at all. Mostly because the language wasn’t really stuff you wanted to tell kids.

Okay maybe it was what you wanted to tell kids sometimes, but it wasn’t words you should tell kids.

But that was beside the point. Out of everything that could possibly keep them up, why would they be up writing a children’s book? It seemed completely absurd to spend all night doing something like this with no reason at all.

Until the child in question stumbled into the galley, and then hummed in annoyance at the lack of food.

“What, are you guys still up?” He asked.

“It’s only like my second cup.” Sanji quickly defended. The rubber man narrowed his eyes at them.

“I think you guys are in too deep. I’ll make my own breakfast, just go to sleep.” Luffy accidentally rhymed. It was met by cheers and declarations of it finally being done, and how they were now free. The four stared on in confusion as the other five celebrated.

Man, it was clear that they needed to go the fuck to sleep.


End file.
